Princess bride being remade… I have thoughts

So, they’re talking about remaking Princess Bride. I have some thoughts. One, more rhyming Fezzig. Two, bring back the spider and the blue door.

Three….

The movie opens with a young girl, sick with a cold, laying on a couch, playing on her phone. Dad, played by Fred Savage, comes into living room holding a steaming bowl of chicken soup and a remote.

“How are you feeling, Buttercup?”

The girl smiles and takes the bowl, blowing on it. “Dad, stop. You haven’t called me that since I was a baby.”

Savage sits down next to her as she sits up a bit, then she snuggles into his side. He tousles her hair. “You’re still my baby. And I was thinking about it because…”

He looks at the remote, then up at the tv. Pan with his vision to a view of the tv, from the couch.

Next to the tv, large and black on the wall, is a shelf with DVDs. On the top of the shelf is a picture of Peter Falk, wearing the hat from the original movie. Among other dvds on the shelf, for the keen eyed, is the complete series of Columbo dvds, and a DVD labeled “Andre the Giant’s biggest hits.”

He sighs. “When I was your age, I had a really bad flu. My grandpa came and read me a book to make me feel better.”

Daughter looks up in concern at the hitch in Savage’s voice. “You… You don’t talk about greatgrandpa much.”

Savage smiles wryly. “I know. I should. I just… miss him so much.”

She nods

“But, Webfilms just released a movie based on the book a couple weeks back. I thought maybe we could watch it together?”

“I dunno. Is it one of those sports films, like that kid who played football?”

Savage smiles. “Yeah, it has sports. Fencing, wrestling, sailing, some parkour. Nature scenes, forests, swamps, oceans. Its got giants, miracles, torture, revenge, true love and magic.”

Daughter looks sideways. “Okay. I’ll give it a try….”

He hits a button, and the title sequence starts.

We then have several interruptions, whenever the movie departs from the original movie, or the book. We break to Savage and daughter, and he complains about some aspect, and then describes how it was in the book, while the daughter hushes him and tells him to unpause the movie.

In the opening farm boy sequence, before the “I love you” realization, we break to the daughter. “Finally, a heroine who knows how to handle dudes.”

Then, with the I love you reveal,

“Hold it, hold it! Are you trying to trick me? Is this a dumb romcom? Does the bad boy get redeemed through the power of her love?”

….

“She doesn’t get eaten by the eels.”
“What?”

“I just, you were grabbing my arm a little tight, you looked concerned.”

“DAAAD. It’s a movie. Of course the princess doesn’t get eaten by eels.”


At one point, we flip to them and Savage is on his feet yelling at the tv. Daughter is pulling his arm.

“Dad, dad! You know, I’m still really sick and you’re taking this movie very seriously. I think we better stop now.”

Savage freezes, looks down at her. “No, no, I’m okay. Sorry, let me sit down. I’m all right.”

“He can’t be dead. Dad, he’s not really dead, right? it’s a trick? ”

“You said no more spoilers.”

“Okay, but, who gets Humperdinck? Its not some lame Disney falling to his death thing, right”

“Nobody gets him. He lives at the end.”

“I swear dad, if he marries Buttercup and she redeems him through the power of her love, I’m going to scream. Why are you showing this to me!?” looks at photo of Falk, Greatgrandpa, why’d you read this to an impressionable little boy!?”

At the end, mom comes home with a sibling, calls daughter into kitchen to take her temp. Daughter looks back at Dad, “Thanks for staying with me today.”

“Anytime Buttercup. Think we should watch it with everyone tomorrow night?”

She smiles. “As you wish!” and walks out. We pan to Savage, standing in front of the TV. He puts two fingers on the base of the photo of Falk, and whispers. “As you wish.”

Webcomic review : Love Not Found

Webcomic review time!

Love not Found , https://lovenotfound.com/


I found this through an interesting advertisment on another comic I read last night, and suddenly two hours were gone and I was reading the most recent comic. PHEW!


First, since some people care about it, the art is consistent, wonderful, and COLORFUL! colors are used very symbolically and thematically, are bold, and pop. Every page is a treat for the eyes.


Story: So, you know Solaria? Asimov’s Solaria, in the Robots series, where people came to not touch / See people, only view them on screens? No human interaction after childhood, physical touch was a dirty thing? Okay, imagine Solaria as its starting that way. Lots of physical PRESENCE between people, but touch, especially intimate touch, is dirty/ disgusting. ( At one point, while on a phone call, our MC says, aww, if I were there, I’d give you a hug. The response is a dead serious, “A what?” the person doesn’t know what a hug is)


In this world of no touch, an accidental trip and fall into each other leaves two people obsessed with the feel and connection of having TOUCHED each other. They explore this, and the very nature of their society, we see relationships rise and fall, lots of family interaction, lots of discussion and musing on the nature of love, sex, intimacy, and connection. Its all.. just so much.

The writing is wonderfully done as well. There are many webcomics that would honestly not stand up as a novel. This one… there are definitely visual elements that would be lost, but the plot is wonderfully paced. Each character has a unique voice. We move through viewpoints seamlessly, and dialogue is natural. The occasional info dumps are done well through classic, but wonderfully executed devices. (My personal favorite is the same as used for the opening of Zootopia, the classic young children performing a class play that simplifies something all adults already know, but that WE don’t as the reader)

This story is set on a backdrop of human colonization of different worlds, humanoforming, ie, genetic manipulation of people to live in environments they weren’t meant for, and more. It’s Hard sci fi, done right, with people and emotions as the central focus around the technology and science You should read it. Its on my list now.